


The Various Uses of a Rubber Duck by Ernie MacMillan [Fic]

by cantarina



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Essays, Gen, Muggles, Rubber Ducks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-01
Updated: 2005-07-01
Packaged: 2017-11-01 14:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/357876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cantarina/pseuds/cantarina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In Muggle Studies, Ernie was assigned to write an essay explaining the purpose of a Muggle object.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Various Uses of a Rubber Duck by Ernie MacMillan [Fic]

A rubber duck is a small plastic object that is often bright yellow with an orange beak. Like a real duck, it has two eyes, but the wings do not extend. There is a suspicious lack of feet, but when it is floated on a body of water (usually a bathtub) and squinted at from a distance, it looks remarkably like a young duckling bobbing up and down on the ripples of a pond.

It's primary function is to keep young Muggle children company while they are bathing so that the parents may leave the room to accomplish other tasks. The rubber duck helps with the child's feelings of abandonment. Should the child wish for their parent to return, they simply pick up the rubber duck and throw it as hard as possible against the nearest wall. It is theorized that the rubber duck was developed because parents were tired of clearing bar soap smears off the wall. It may also distract a child during the unpleasant minutes when shampoo is being rinsed off.

Some smaller rubber ducks have been seen, half the size of the originals, which are assumed to be produced for convenience in travel, or for very small flats. One Ministry wizard uncovered a rubber duck stylized to imitate the devil; its function is still unclear, though several academics theorize it is used by particularly superstitious Muggles to ward off supernatural forces. (In reality, of course, they have no such beneficial effects.)

Some children claim their rubber ducks can move and even talk, but upon close examination by wizards, all such claims have been proven to be nothing but poppycock.


End file.
